A Not So True Story Of A Boy Named James

Me: aaaaaaaccchhhuuuuuu sniffle sniffle, iiiim bbboooaarrdd walk to mom hey moooooom is there something for me to dooooo

Mom: hhhm let me think, well you could play a board game

Me: Mom I am an only child, and theirs no one to play a board game with except you and... well, nevermind

Mom: ok then maybe do your school

Me: mom the only thing that would do is make me even more board. anything else

Mom: oh I know, you could read a book

ME: whichhhh onee

Mom: Hmmm what about the phantom toolbooth

Me: no no I already reeeeaad iiiiit

Mom: ok, here read this book Book Walk and get book then hand to me

Me: Thannnnks Mooooom. Books Name Aaaaa hhhhhhh ok where should I start, eeehhh skip the introduction, ok the start of the book. Once upon the time there was a boy named Millie Millie, weird name but that is not what this story is about. Start dozing out This story is about a boy named James. Hey thats my name to Doze out Soon Now James was a  a... Be Tired But Amazed Hhhhhhello anyone there.

Tenia: Hey boy. Well you look cute. Whats your name?

Me: uhhhh James 

Tenia: Nice naaame, my name is tenia. so where are you going?

Me: uuum I I don’t know, anywhere I guess

Tenia: OK Well heres a map. Here is Heentsville, then here is Pinkton. I would suggest you go to one of those places.

Me: Ok uum I guess I’ll go to Heentsville then 

Tenia: Well I’ll see you later 

Me: Ya see you later, Might as well run, at least I would get some exercise, run and get tired, ehh iiiim done 

Narrator: After running put hand on side of mouth for less than 5 yards he walked and walked and walked and walked and walked.

Me: Iiiim sooooo tired, I wish there was somewhere to sleep

Homeless guy: Would you spare me some change

Me: uuuum if I do coould I stay with you for the night

Homeless guy: Ok

Me: ok yawn thanks, heres a nickel 

homeless guy: Take nickel don’t stink anything up

Me: wake up stretch and yawn Next Day ahhh, hmm the hobos gone, what am I saying, I was sleeping with a hobo. Eeeeew, I guess I should start going again. start walking Hmmm I fill a lot lighter check pockets That guy stole all my stuff, wait a minute shake and be disgusted He even stole my underwear. It wouldn’t even fit him. and how did he do it? 

Narrator: well after all that was over, James went on his way again.

Me: Wow five hundred sixty thousand, nine hundred and forty two inches and I finally made it to Heentsville. aww this is a cool place. might as well meet some people. Excuse me, hello my name is James, I’m new to this town.

Heenckle: Hello my name is Heenckle. Nice to meet you Have cain and eye Glass

Me: Ya ok well umm where could I get some food here I am hungry, oh I also need a job, because I got robbed by a homeless guy. By the way never sleep with a homeless guy, because it turns out that they aren’t as nice as they seem.
Heenckle: Ok, well there are some restaurants up ahead and the one named bills diner is hiring right now.

Me: Ok thank you  walk the rest aw Bills diner, What an original name Excuse me but your sign said you are hiring and I would like to apply for the  job.

Bob: Alright here are the papers, just read them and sign at the end.

Me: Ok, and What is your name

Bob: Its Bob

Me: But I thought this place is called Bills Diner, Not Bobs Diner

Bob: Which one sounds better, bobs or bills

Me: Bills

Bob: Well that is why 

Me: Smile then frown whoa that is a ton of reading, last page, name signed. Here you go bob

Bob: That was fast, you didn’t just sign your name and not read it did you

Me: uuuuuuuuuum hehe no

Bob: ok good because whenever people do that, you know what I do to them?

Me: No What?

Bob: I make them eat my mothers cooking

Me: oh thats it

Bob: THATS IT Have You Tried My Moms Cooking

Me: No

Bob: Ok well enough with that, right now you are going to start your job and be the dishwasher man. The kitchen is right over there

Me: Huh ok. wow that is a lot of dishes, how do they even get all of these. ok so what do I do now, well I’ve seen mom do it once but then she asked me to load, and I have never done it before, well I argued to her and whined and was sent to the corner to stare at a picture of Jesus and think about what I did, so I actually never have done it before.
Ok so I think I get this dish and put it right here. and get this one and put it right here.

Narrator: after struggling with it for a while it was time to put in the dishwasher soap

Me: So now I guess I put this soap stuff on all of the dishes. Close it up. hmmm which button, I guess since I would want to get done good and quickly I should press the heavy wash. ok I’m done. hey Bob what do I do now.

Bob: let me see the dishwasher. WHAT HAPPENED. There Is Soap Coming Out And The Whole Thing Is Shaking.

Me: Watch out its going to explode. It won’t stop Walk slowly up to it and act out, Catch knife in front of face and dishes are flying out, I have to stop it. Hhhh got it, are you ok

Bob: you saved me.

Me: I didn’t ask that

Bob: ya I’m fine, for doing that, I am inviting you to come over to my house and stay the night, and my mom will be cooking tonight for dinner.

Me: Ok thank you, I’m starving

Narrator: James went over to Bobs house completely ignoring what he told him about his moms cooking. Well it didn’t turn out that good. After that James went to explore Heentsville.

Me: Whoa its a juggler, Thats awesome he’s juggling a knife, torch and a balloon. How is he doing that? Excuse me Sir,
Juggler: Yes

Me: I mean mam may I try to juggle, thanks Act out good I can Juggle, I can POP OUCH OOOO

Juggler: YOU POPPED MY BALOON, BROKE MY TORCH AND CRACKED MY KNIFE COME HERE YOU

ME: AAAAAAAAAA Shugg Back and forth wake up 

Mom: Honey wake up, wake up

Me: AAAAAAAAA

Mom: Hey hey hey its ok, it was just a dream, are you ok

Me: ya I think so

Mom: ok good I wanted to ask you if you wanted to go to church tonight, and maybe make some friends as well

Me: ya ya ya I would like that

Mom: Ok say it like you are sort of laughing and the leave

Me: Ok I’m going to church sorta laugh than have an idea But before I go I am Going to blog this run get laptop jump on couch open laptop then type for 3 seconds then over.

Zacchaeus

I was a tax collector in Jericho. I was also vary wealthy. I kept hearing talk about a man named Jesus, who could do amazing things and I got curious about him. When he was coming through town there was a large crowd and I couldn't see him over all the people because I am just not that tall. I climbed up a sycamore tree so I could see him. It was the strangest thing...When Jesus got to where I was he stopped and looked right at me. He said, come down immediately. For I must stay at your house today. I couldn't believe it. I came down and welcomed him right into my home. Now some of the people in the crowd were saying bad things about me. But I was changed! I said, look, lord for I will give half of my possessions to the poor, and if I have cheated anybody out of anything, I will pat them back four times the amount. I am so glad that God forgave me and used me even after all the bad things I have done.

So kids, do you know who I am

You Don't, well have you heard this song beforeZacchaeus was a wee little man, a wee little man he was. He climbed up top a sycamore tree to see what he could see. And Jesus said, Zacchaeus, you come down. For I'm going to your house today, for I'm going to your house today.
so kids, do you know who I am now
YOU STILL DON'T, I SAID MY NAME LIKE TWICE
STUPID KIDS
I'm going to be this charecter for charecter quest. (not the end part)
I HOPE YOU KNOW WHO I AM

WOW, I'm Already Married, engaged and asked to get married again

The last post I put, I put a ton of little emoji doodles. And only clouds popped up. Oh and by the way, you know the person I'm engaged to? Well I'm married to someone else(:It happened so fast:). and there was someone else that also asked to marry me, but I turned her down(I shouldn't have done that)So I'm married to one person, engaged to another, and someone asked me to marry them. (:I guess I'm popular now or something, I don't know:). girls come from everywhere and they are mostly older than me, but they can't get their hands off me:), all three of them are like 4, 5, or 6 years older than me (:Oh Ya:). Ok well we will stop talking about my life and talk about yours... Ok good life now lets go back to mine, Ummm, Hmmm Lets Seee Here Whats In My Life That I Can Talk About, Ooh I know, My Garner State Park post is the only post really talking about Dancing and all that stuff(:girls:), and its the only post with comments;(.so sad, to bad);
So anyways I just went to Galvaston and me and like 6 other boyscouts got buried deap in the sand, and one of us could not get out. We also made the biggest sand castle in the world, so big that we went on a fairy and someone saw us and remembered it there and said it was awesome. Last time the boyscouts went to Galvaston a boyscout got hit by a conoe and went to the hospital( he gets hurt on every campout) so because of that he didn't go this time.

Yo Mama, My Sister

Yo Mama is so ugly, she lives in Kentuky, and she even has no swag.
She found a lost puppy and named it Humpty Dumpty, which made me really mad.

Throw a penny in a well, and make it look real swell.
Then make a wish, which will get you a fish.

Like my poems, I made them myself:)... My sister is a blonde so heres a true story about her life, I mean a blonde joke.
There was a blonde, burnett, and a redhead (of coarse), the burnett says she will be the first one on the moon, the redhead said he will be the first one on mars, the blonde said she'l be the first one on the sun, the burnnet said you will burn if you go to the sun, the blonde said NO STUPID I'll go at night. HAHAHAHAHAH, Yayyyyyyyyy :)
Also zombies want brains and so if there is a zombie attack, blondes will rule the world.

I'm Back😊

Hey guys, I'm 1⃣3⃣ now, I'm so old👴¡¡¡ My brother👦tout, towt, toit, tot, however you say it, me how to doodle😱. I'm on my new iPad that my brother got me for nothing👎, well my brother👦 did get paid for it from my mom👩, so we are happy( well I don't know about my mom). I just went to a concert and saw Justin Bieber😰, I mean Toby Mac😍. It was awesome😏. This is to all you Justin Bieber girl lovers💗, he sounds just like you when you sing😁. so anyways I just saw an awesome movie, I saw sfdnvoisudfhgvousymeowgaruiovbgesoubvmeowbgaerobvgabergbmeowmeow, OOPS😲 that was my cat🐱, I saw Taken 2. Ummmmm Sooooo see you later, if you go to church or something then I will see you later. You know how people👯 do that, say see you later when really you aren't going to see them later. And you know how people👯 do that to, say bye then talk more, mostly parents👩👨, they say WE ARE LEAVING, then you go to the car🚙 and you see them talking again and it takes them thirty minutes to leave. And then they finally are ready to go and they go to the car🚙, then you're in side talking and they get all mad at you and you have to leave. I'm not a parent👨 so I'm actually going to stop, So GOODBYE again😊

Hair Cut, Muddy Faces, No Milk, Congrats, and One More To Go.

So my going to be wife got her HAIR CUT, and donated it today, then sent me a picture of it . Why would she do that? She should have left it long. Her hair went all the way to her knees. If I was 7 years older I would of talked her out of it. I don't think I've even seen her before other than Skype, well I've seen her, but I guess I don't remember ( I was young ).
Earlier my mom put stuff on my sister and brothers faces that made them look like they had MUDDY FACES ( don't know what it is..Some sort of clay or something ).
At home, we had NO MILK for like 1 week, well it felt that long, it was really 2 days. We only had soy milk and almond milk, but those milks are grossly nasty. Now, we finally have milk that actually came from a cow. The way it should be.
My bro's graduating in two days ( CONGRATS FOR HIM ). There's going to be like 25 people here. My sister and I cleaned all day for him and he didn't even say thank you ( he's soooo kind, but he said thank you when he read this ). I'm running out of siblings, thats the bad thing about being the youngest ( ONE MORE TO GO ).

Finally Online ( and My Dogs, Rabbits, and Chickens )

My mom Finally said that I can put my blog off private. It's just that my sister has to check it to see if I put private stuff on it and correct it, but other than that it's all good.
 Do you remember my dog hector?????????????

We have another dog named Dobie ( thats a boy name, she's a girl ). I don't really like Dobie ( she's annoying ). Hectors the white one, and Dobies the brown one. This is weird: Hector and Dobie find eggs on the ground from our chickens and sorta suck on them, they don't brake them they just leave them in their mouth.
Then there's my chickens. They follow me everywhere, hoping I'll give them food. Theres one rooster, with like 8 female chickens.
Then my rabbits, there's a three legged one, but here's the story of them.
I was home one Easter Day and my uncle was coming over and whenever he got here he had three rabbits. He said people were selling them off the side of the road, so he decided to buy them for us. We ended up keeping them. Me and my dad made a sorta big cage for them and in a while they had babies. One of the babies had another babies skin wrapped around it's leg, my brother saved it by unwrapping it.

The rabbit lost it's leg, we tried to put bandages around it but she kept taking them off. There is a runt, he is smaller than all of the other rabbits, and looks like a wild rabbit, he is my favorite.We have had like 50 babies die, more like 65, but it doesn't matter ( around that ). I've had 22 rabbits at once, right now I have 8. So thats the story of our rabbits ( like it ).